On the road to true ownership we all face the pin drop silence when we realise that no saviour is coming. That is the nucleus, the catalyst for most of the decisions you will make in your life thereafter. I sometimes think that adulthood itself is only a metaphor for ownership of your own experience but never the less we all face that moment. It's at that point something very interesting happens. People either rise to the challenge or they begin to infantalise themselves. You either throw yourself into the fire of creation or you find ways to numb yourself out. Unfortunately too many people choose the latter. They numb themselves with gossip, alchohol, sugar, chaos of all different flavours but underneath it all is the same thing. Fear. They are overwhelmed by life. I am not blaming them or pointing the finger because if we are honest, life is overwhelming. I don't think we are raised with the proper coping skills to deal with the ever changing landscapes. When we became person centric as a culture instead of community based we lost a great deal of knowledge that was passed down from our elders. Now what we see is a lot of people scrambling to both create a life that they want whilst also being deathly afraid of it.
All change within our lives begins with our capacity to create. To think in limitless ways. The more we gently open our minds to dreaming about possibilities the more we tip toe into ownership. Imagine that there were no roadblocks in your life. What would you do? How would you spend your day? If money was no obstacle how would you spend your time on the planet? If you could have any job that you wanted which would it be? If you could pursue any passion what would it be? Play with this idea for a while, you'd be surprised at how often you have tailored your own thoughts due to limited thinking. So many people have made their dreams small so as not to feel threatened. Why not dream big? Why not dive head first into your imagination with all the zest you had as a five year old? You don't have to act upon those dreams, you may think them through and decide that they are actually not for you. You may think them through and they may lead you to something else. The point is to start. To really give yourself the possibility to play within the confines of your own mind.
I know it seems strange, that the gateway to ownership begins with thinking like a 5 year old but there it is. Dreaming is the first step in admitting to yourself what it is that you really want. Once you are there that's when you make the choice either to continue to play with that idea or to be afraid of it. I always say to clients that you don't have to do everything all in one go. So many people think that transforming your life is like the movies where you shave your hair off and do an Eat, Pray, Love journey. That works for some people and it's interesting to watch it happen but for most of us transformation is a step by step, day by day process. And to be honest even with the huge shifts that we witness in people lives it often is the end result of a step by step process. If you want to change careers, you don't have to do it today but why not have a google and see what steps you would need to take? If you want a lover, why not go on a dating app and see what's out there? Begin a relationship with the desire that is innate to you. That's where your transformation will truly begin.
Thank you for reading,
Big Love,
Ryan James x
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