Service is probably one of the most overlooked parts of the cultural spiritual image. When we talk about service in the self help community unfortunately we conjure white washed images of happy smiles and complex yoga poses. We don't talk enough about the courage, the conviction and sometimes the dirty work that needs to happen. It's also one of the areas where, if you don't have a good grounding and awareness of any people pleasing hiccups in your energy then you can easily lose yourself down a service themed rabbit hole. I figured out years ago that I am just as happy for someone else's success as I am my own. Few things make me cry easily but watching someone get something that they really want is one of them. I love seeing the completion of manifestations in someone's life so, as a young man I put two and two together and came out with five. I thought that I would invest in helping other people achieve their dreams. Sounds like a good idea right? The crappy part was that I did it at the expense of my own happiness and when you bring a giving mindset to the table you will always attract those willing to take.
So the question becomes how do you help those around you without losing your mind? How do you step into a place where you are of real value to the light within yourself and honour the souls you encounter without costing yourself any energy? I only started to ask myself these questions after years of cyclical exhaustion. I know this feels familiar to some of you. It's why we keep running ourselves down all the time. We mistake service for people pleasing. It's so easy to do, I get it but until you start your service with serving the self you will always stumble into it. My first act of service is self care. I make sure that I am energetically ready to stay in a space of light around other human beings. It doesn't always work, that's just life. We can all be irritated into irrational states of mind but if you approach the day in that way then you're already on a losing streak. Make sure that you are as aware of how you feel as you can be before you start your day because that will help you to protect yourself from losing energy.
The easiest way to tell the difference between service and people pleasing is to acknowledge the moments when you are betraying yourself. Whilse service may ask you to compromise your time, location or assets it will never require you to behave outside your moral compass. People pleasing is when you are running around looking after someone in FULL knowledge that they can do it for themselves but are choosing not to and you know you are enabling them. Service will make you tired but happy tired. People pleasing will exhaust you and then still ask for more. If you find yourself in a cycle of people pleasing then I have good news! The way to stop it is something you already have within your posession, the capacity to say “No.”. Firm, respectful, love centred, no. Remember that you are of greatest service to the Universe when you are filled with love. You are of greatest use when you take care of yourself first. It is then when the Universe in her infinite intelligence can guide you more readily into a space of cocreating miracles because that really is what we are here to do. You were born to make miracles happen and you have everything you need to get there.
Thank you for reading,
Big Love,
Ryan James x
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