One of the hardest and most over looked jobs on the planets is parenting. I have to admit it but I'm a little cranky in the morning pre coffee and sometimes when I am sat there in the coffee shop and a kid is screaming I want my own head to explode but I quickly remember that I get to walk away from a screaming child, a parent doesn't. I have often marveled at parents with their children as I have walked Oscar around the park at just how quickly they create a space to enter the child's world whilst also preparing them for the world that they are in. The relentless questioning, the unrelenting responsibility, the constant worry are all daily parts of parenthood and we just don't give them enough credit. I have personally chosen to not explore parenthood. I have no interest in becoming a dad and to be honest I never have. I grew up thinking that I would become a parent but honestly I soon realised that I was only thinking that as a matter of course rather than a real, considered choice. Even though I have chosen not to be one I have a deep respect for parenting and of course a deep fascination with it.
Of course parenting is hard. Clearing up poop, pee, vomit, sleep depravation, financial obliteration, social dynamics shifting, personal growth, none of these jobs are easy and they are of course the tip of the ice berg. But to watch someone's first words, first steps, first questions. To be the fist person someone cuddles in their entire life and to be the witness to that unrelenting love within your soul must be a wonderful experience. I guess with 40 being around the corner I am looking at parenting in a different way. I am old enough now to have actually watched people grow up and with my friends having babies and me being an uncle to Stu's niece and nephew I am watching how parenthood is actively changing the people around me. It's wonderful to witness but it's also disconcerting how overlooked it is. In many ways we have lost the community that used to raise children. We have made parenting an almost solitary act and it was never intended to be like that. Families raise children, communities raise children, culture raises children and I think we could all benefit from looking at the world through the eyes of a child now and again to help us reorient our perspective.
It is such a tricky line to walk to prepare your children for the world and to want to protect them from it at the same time. How do you create emotionally strong children? The truth is there is no handbook. Each child is different because each spirit is different therefore what each child needs will be different. You never parent two kids the same, even if they are under the same roof. They will require something unique from you. What's wonderful to know is in terms of spirit, the children actually choose the parents. That little being you held/hold in your arms picked you out so that your energy could be a platform for what they came to the planet to do. Your love was starting point of all of their dreams. Parents, just in case no one has told you in a while I just want to say well done! I watch in absolute marvel at your skill, your dedication to raising a human being and you're doing a good job. Keep going and I promise you that I will do my best where I can to support your journey...even if I haven't had my coffee yet. Haha x
Thank you,
Big Love,
Ryan James x
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