There is an idea that the older you get the harder it is to make a change in your life. We all hear about the “Eat, Pray, Love” journeys where people just pack up their lives and jet off on wild and wonderful adventures but some don't have that kind of agency. Some people really are stuck in a financial hole that is hard to climb out of. Hard but not impossible. If you've ever had serious financial troubles you'll know that in those cases hope becomes a sword and shield that you have no choice but to pick up each day. That is the silver lining of that situation and that is the lens through which you can begin to create change. I live a pretty autonomous life but I still need to grow, I still need to evolve into whatever I am on a journey towards. I am finding more and more as I grow that I come up against an internal wall, the idea to not “rock the boat” and keep the steady status quo even though steady isn't always exciting. I think most of the limits we put on ourselves growing are always inside our own heads. I've come across people who are so immobilized by this that they have even stopped themselves from dreaming of a better life such is the pain of their own. Personally I like to know what my options are, even if they are limited I like to make a plan.
I think thats the nucleus of all change, the plan, the dream. You have to start somewhere. What if it's been so long that you don't even know where to start? Or what if you don't know what your dream even might be? Well if that's the case you're in luck. You happen to be born inside a Universe filled with choice. Start with the small things, where in the world would you like to visit? What would you like to see? What experiences would you like to have? For me I've always wanted to visit Japan and see the amazing origami centres there. I want to go to Canada and breathe in it's unspoiled nature I want to spend a few days in Paris, see all the tourist stuff in New York, drink coffee in Italy and continue to visit and explore my spiritual home Greece! For years I had so little money that these really were just pipe dreams but as I've grown and I've learned to plan more meticulously ALL of these dreams are becoming possible. The hurdle I find myself hitting is always in a creative goal setting and creative dreaming. I've caught myself on a few occasions scoffing at myself for wanting to play in a certain area. My own internal ageism has been chiming in which is a fairly new thing. Still, I want to make choices about my future based on whether I want to do them rather than whether I feel like I am too old to even start!
Being raised a bloke in our culture has given me a fairly acute sense of ownership. I am fully aware that I have had complete agency to move towards the things that I choose and I get the privilege of that whilst also understanding that not everyone has the same. Still, I really do feel that if you don't even let yourself dream and begin to explore those dreams then you aren't going to get anywhere. I don't want you just to create a mental space to retreat to, I want you to get an action plan. If it's saving a few quid a week or finding cheap art supplies to start creating, or finding maps of places you want to see make a move towards a dream. If you are finding a dream to move towards then start hanging around other dreamers. Find people who are doing what they love and start asking them out for coffee! You will start to pick up on that vibration and it will help. Like I often say you don't have to do it all but you will start to feel better if you just take a first step. A plan, a prospectus, looking at courses on line, the smallest step is still a step. You can do this!
Thank you for reading,
Big Love,
Ryan James x
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