When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change. That's what one of my favourite metaphysical teachers Wayne Dyer used to say and, over the years I have reaffirmed that idea to myself over and over. This year has been tough for so many of us, myself included and within what has felt primarily like the labour pains of birthing a new life I have reaffirmed the power of reclaiming the energy that I bring to a space. Because no matter what is going on in my life I am always responsible for the energy of my own being. No matter how much pain I am in, lashing out, hurting others or even indulging in hurting myself go against what I feel is a compassionate lifestyle. Sometimes pain can feel overwhelming and I understand that, pain is a part of the human experience but it is up to you and it will always be up to you whether you find it within yourself to allow your courage to grow bigger and brighter than your pain. Your mind is a powerful thing and you get to choose how to use it. You get to choose to tell it what to focus on and how it can work for you. You were given a Universe to play with inside your own body. I am so grateful for each experience I have had. Each one has taught me something valuable about myself or about the company I keep. Each day I get to wake up inside a life filled with all the wonderful, frantic, creative, beautiful moments that make a life up. I look back and I wouldn't change a thing.
One of the things I have learned is how to navigate emotional pain. I have learned to let it come. To let it wash over me and to surrender into the ugly cry if necessary. I have learned to sift through grief and do my best to find what I need to get me through the day. I didn't always succeed. Sometimes I just crawled around on the floor and screamed at the sky but, that's O.K too. The only mistake I ever made in my relationship with pain was identifying with it. I turned myself into a victim, a martyr. I made who I was about the pain I had experienced rather than the potential of my being. There is a difference between who you are and how you have been hurt. It took me a while to realise that. Now, my personal history is nothing other than a decorative frame for the picture of my soul. Some days you will have to fight and work hard to find something to be grateful for. Some days forgiveness is just too far away and you'll have to settle for being slightly less angry than you were yesterday. Some days you are just going to have to break down and cry for hours until you feel like you can breathe again. It's all O.K. Let it happen. The more you resist it the longer you will be in it.
When you realise that pain is something that you experience rather than something you are it gives you the power to have a different perspective on it. You get to look at it differently. You get to decide whether this pain, the experience will be the catalyst for a new you or a regurgitation of who you used to be. You are so richly empowered with choice that is so often gets over looked. Letting yourself feel something isn't the same thing as letting it destroy you. When you look at this through the lens of ego you will feel like the Universe is decimating your life, when you see it through love, soul, spirit, you see it for the careful deconstruction that it is. Change the way you think about what you are experiencing. If you want to take ownership of it, which is not always the same thing as taking control, then you are going to have to start with conversation happening between your own ears first. Remember that how you language the world to yourself is how the world tends to behave. No matter what you are dealing with you are never alone, you are never not guided and you are always seen and loved. Take it one step at a time and in no time at all you'll emerge as something different.
Thank you for reading,
Big Love,
Ryan James x
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