We've all been there but how do you really know what the right choice is at the time? How do you know when to stick with something and fight or when to cut your losses and walk away? It could be a job, a relationship, a friendship or a lifestyle but there comes a point when you wake up in the middle of it and for a time you allow yourself into the feeling space of control. Fight or flight. In or out. You have to choose. I've learned this lesson the hard way. I've hung onto relationships way past their sell by date, I've hung onto friends, jobs, lifestyles and everything else in between for years after I should have cut it loose. Now that I am older I have studied the signs enough to know when to get out of something a lot earlier. Thankfully I haven't had to make that choice in a while, at least not in a major way. The only thing I have had to do is surrender ome clients to the Universe and that was done as gently as I could. I understand that you don't always have the luxury of doing it so quietly, sometimes you are going to have to carve yourself out of a life that you have found yourself in but if it needs doing, then it needs doing.
The tell tale sign for me that something needs changing is very simple. I don't feel good. I don't mean that I am in a bad mood or I'm just going through a little funk, we all have those, I mean when you feel awful in your stomach and you've been in that space for months. When you wake up tired, sleepwalk through your day, give half hearted smiles and are up and down throughout the night because your body wont rest. When you are in that space you are in trouble and you need to make a shift. You are solely responsible for your own happiness so if you find yourself deeply unhappy then it's time to move. So, in or out? Happy or not? This is what you are left to deal with. The quickest way to deal with it is to not bother dealing with the situation but with the energy that created it. Deal with you first. Get quiet, listen to what your body is telling you, if it isn't telling you anything then that's a sign that you are in trouble right there. If you are that disconnected from your inner voice then you need to spend time working solely on you. It's only in that space do you really connect with the wisdom of what to do.
I have been guided to remain silent and let friendships die, I have been guided to act and cut relationships in their tracks, I have been told to walk from jobs and never look back and I have also been told to stay and breathe when I felt like running away. Your internal guidance is beyond a feeling. It's a knowing that you spend a lot of your time and energy fighting against and the more you fight the more life will humble into a space of accepting what is in your heart. You know when you look at someone whether they are meant to be a part of your life or not. You know when it's time to get in the muck and help someone and you know when it's time to just sit there and breathe and pray. You may not like that you know, you may not be at peace with what you know but you know. One of my favourite quotes ever is by Terry Pratchett and one of his characters, Granny Weatherwax, a wise and feisty witch says, “You'll spend the rest of your life learning what's already in your bones.”. I love that idea and it's stuck with me since I read it. So if you are in that space right now of choosing, left or right, up or down, leave or stay, take a moment to breathe and pray and listen to what your bones are telling you.
Thank you ,
Big Love,
Ryan James